Indian BBQ Shrimp

The Ingredients for BBQ Shrimp

Main ingredient (#1)

Raw shrimp with shell, head, whiskers, and tail -- You have three choices; 1 Lb. 15-20 count (medium) or 10-15 count (large) or 5-10 (jumbo). These are hyped as large, jumbo and super jumbo in supermarkets. Buy in "ChinaTown" there is no hype; just smell. Seriously, we are buying a smelly product, not diamonds. Do not get precooked, or shelled shrimp. If you do, the recipe will yield a rubbery product good for your ex-Spouse, or not in favor in-laws. It may also ruin the relationship that you currently are in. Dead shrimp should not be given that privilege. Do not turn a shrimp into a shrink. Peeling the shell will make it so. You are alerted. Let’s get on.

Base ingredients (#2)

1 diced large onion (red or yellow depends on your bio rhythm)
1 Table Spoon crushed ginger root (or 1  Tea Spoon ginger powder if you are from a different planet)
6 cloves crushed garlic (only way to confront a smelly shrimp)
5 curry leaves (optional… if you are geographically challenged)
2 green chilies (cayenne) slit lengthwise.
1/2 lb butter (This will kill you. Don’t worry you will die one day. Enjoy while you can.)
1/2 lb margarine or butter (Lets not go to the dark side)

Hot ingredients (#3)

2 Table Spoons crushed red pepper (The kind you will kill for, to put on a pizza pie while away from home, and with a nagging family.)
1 Table Spoon Black crushed pepper (Cannot get any easier.)
1 Table Spoon White crushed pepper (Revert to black, if you are pepper variety challenged)

Sauces/Pastes (#4)

2 Table Spoons Perrin’s Worchester shire sauce (Soy, if you are cheap!)
2 Tea Spoons hot mustard (Dejon/Frenches or the stuff you can palm away from McDonalds, or ball park concession stands)
3 Table Spoon red Tabasco Sauce or Red devil hot sauce (This will improve your comprehension scores in GRE, GMAT, LSAT, FMG and H1-Visa)
1 Tea Spoon Thai or Vietnamese fish sauce (This is a powerful substitute for salt.)

Indian Spices (#5)

1 Tea Spoon crushed coriander seeds
½ Tea Spoon cumin seeds
1 Tea Spoon yellow curry powder (turmeric is an option; ignoring is fine too)
1/2 Tea Spoon black mustard seed (adds intrigue and to dentist bills)
4 leaves bay leaves (Indian kind are different from Laurel.)
2 whole red dried peppers (mirchi, for the natives)

Herbs (#6)

2 Tea Spoons dry oregano (Alert!. Without oregano you might as well order a pizza, and stop cooking)
1/2  Tea Spoon dry dill (It is heartless not have this! Many Hindi movies depend on this Spice in story lines.)
1/2 Tea Spoon dry parsley (This, and the following three herbs are dedicated to Ann Brancroft. For the clue less, remember the Graduate movie- 1968.)
1/2 Tea Spoon dry sage (A calming effect)
1/2  Tea Spoon rosemary (Male chefs feel deprived without this. Females do just fine.)
1/2 Tea Spoon dry thyme (To keep the recipe in rhythm)
1/2  Tea Spoon lemon peel (Shavings of a lemon. Please do not peel the squeezable plastic RealLemon)

Cooking Fluids (#7)

1 12 oz. can Clam Juice or fish stock or water (Whatever turns you on)
4 oz. Beer (Buy a case it is cheaper. Drink the rest to be happy, happy while cooking)
2 Table Spoons cooking oil

Whew! We are done assembling the ingredients in the groups we want.

Method

In a large Dutch oven (Fancy name for a deep pot) heat the cooking oil to medium heat.

1. Fry the Indian Spices (#5) to release the flavor. (Do not answer if, the phone rings at this time.)
2. Add half the margarine and let it melt.
3. Add the herbs (#6) and fry gently (If you do it right, nobody living in the subdivision should have a coughing fit).
4. Add the whole shrimp. The main ingredient (#1). (Washed, nothing is peeled or discarded. This could be traumatic for first timers. Think of your childhood sweetheart that some else has married currently. It will give you courage to proceed. Otherwise, you are on your own.)
5. Fry till the shrimp turns light red in color. (This will happen, not withstanding our prior loves, or arranged marriages.)
6. Add the base (#2), and hot ingredients (#3) and the rest of butter and margarine. Stir fry for ten minutes without abusing the shrimp.
7. Mix all the sauces and pastes (#4) in a cup, and then, add it to the stuff on the stovetop.
8. Reduce heat from medium to low. Simmer for 15 minutes. (Now, answer that phone. Feed your kids regular food. They will make faces at this recipe while in progress. Ignore them. Just as you would, your in-laws.)
9. Preheat your oven to 375 F.
10. In a deep flat pan or a large casserole disk transfer the stuff in the Dutch oven. (Flatter the better. Deep is bad. It will not expose the stuff to heat. You should expose it all. Somewhat of a confessional. Non Catholics will not understand this.)
11. Add the cooking fluids (#7) and cover it with aluminum wrap. Do not crimp the foil around the edges. Just, let it lay. Cook for at least 90 minutes. The water based liquids should evaporate. Adjust for salt. You should have the shrimp with very loose jackets floating in nice clarified butter. Be cautious! Everything is at 375 F.
    
12. The kitchen is smelling shrimp. If you do not like it light two incense sticks (agarbathhi). Above all, do not apologize. We did this with love.
    
13.  Invite your mother-in-law for dinner. If you do not have one, borrow mine (angel@motherOfAllRecourse.org). Just kidding! [This is the obligatory last 13th step in all my recipes.]

Note: My nephews Nikhil and Sameer call this dish "Head'NTail Shrimp" and they can't wait for me to cook it when I visit them. The hot stuff mellows with butter. Don't skimp on it. Butter is the secret of the recipe. Just, peel and eat. Dunk French bread in the sauce. Messy, but oodles of fun! Wash your hands with vigor before you retire. The fingers can be toxic, otherwise.